This post is a departure for me. I consciously post upbeat topics but I think it’s important to be honest, in a way that helps others. Let me know if this resonates with you or got you thinking and post your comments here on the blog.
I once said to someone that many of us are here in this lifetime to hone in and rectify a relationship that we have with another. That’s what karma is, making a conscious choice. It’s not a ridiculous payback that you have in dogmatic religious minds but the ability to make a decision that may be different than what we are used to.
Throughout our lifetime difficulties arise in different scenarios but there is usually one person who is a thorn at our side. Often we are most challenged by someone close to us. If it happens to be a close family member it can make “family” both a comfort and a battle zone.
That training ground gives us the ability to spot a difficult person. So rather than fault the other party, reflect on what and how you can do to support your personal growth while respecting your needs.
This is what I have summed up that unpleasant people hold as recognizable traits. While they may not hold up a neon sign, if you’re sensitive like I am they might as well because my body flashes inner signals loud and clear and it’s up to me to honor my needs.
They belittle you, insult you, or name-call
They leave you out of conversations
They always have an answer for everything
They have difficulty with emotional regulation
People avoid them or are afraid of their temper
They exhibit toxic traits like drinking, crying, insisting you do things their way, or gossiping
They second-guess everything you say or do
Their private and public behavior is inconsistent
They exhibit extreme jealousy, codependency, immense control, or other undesirable attitudes
They can “go off” at any minute
They are often labeled "rude" which means rude awakening, so watch out!
They also alternate between bully and victim and their voice changes
They thrive on having subordinates around them whom they have dominated, bullied
and disrespected
You don’t feel comfortable around them.
So what do you do instead? Stay calm and pay attention to how you react. While you can’t please everyone, live in your truth and be conscious of doing your inner work. If you have created a buffer or tried to use humor to deflate a situation and all else fails, eject yourself, even if it means you make friends with loneliness; you will have sanity.
Keep in mind while there’s often not much we can do to change their behavior, we can change our responses and minimize how they affect us.
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That’s my interpretation of karma. Hope that helps and thanks for joining in.
The clarification on "Karma" was especially helpful!! Thank you for sharing.